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Lift and Separate

3/23/2011

2 Comments

 
Remember the first time you saw or heard about car bras?  It was definitely a WTF moment for me.  They weren't the big pointy cones like the ones Madonna wore back in the day, they were just these bits of leather, pleather, faux leather, vinyl - whatever material fits the budget - that went around the headlights.  One ad stated it was for hood protection, yet the 'leather' barely spread 8" above the headlight and to me that's not really protecting the entire hood.  Sort of like going out into a downpour with a lace hankie held over your head - not really going to do much good. 

I thought car bras had faded into the realm of pet rocks and earth shoes.  They made an initial splash, then were relegated to the embarrassment of the basement, garage or dumpster.  But I saw a little white car (make/model unknown) the other day outfitted in a black bra and I couldn't help but think how stupid it was.  It didn't seem to serve any purpose at all and my penchant for anthropomorphizing things made me feel embarrassed for the car.  Did it really want to be seen out in public wearing a bra? 

Now something that would be useful would be a car thong.  For those minor fender-benders that make it nearly impossible for you to shut your trunk properly, strap a pleather car thong on that thang and voila!   No more fiddling around with bungie cords, duct tape, or expensive auto-body shop repairs.  To cap it off, slap a tramp stamp (bumper sticker) up on the trunk in the spot above the thong to add to the high end look.
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